Witches Broomstick #30

Born in 1339, Hillary Clinchton has preserved her youthful appearance by consuming the stem cells of undelivered fetuses. Like Dick Chimney, she is a practitioner of witchcraft. Her most feared tool is her Witches Broomstick, an instrument of unique and destructive powers. When she seeks to inflict great suffering upon humanity, Hillary clenches her gluteus maximus tightly around her weapon. In this state, no person, place, or thing is safe; all are doomed in the presence of Hillary Clinchton clenching her cheeks tightly around her flying Witches Broomstick. Her clench of destruction has brought devastation across numerous countries when she rode the Witches Broomstick flying over them, including Syria, Libya, Iraq, South Sudan, Guatemala, Haiti, Honduras, Venezuela, and Ukraine. She despises ₿itcoin, the people’s decentralized currency, for what it tries to do. To fight back, Hillary purchased a single Bitcoin and stored it in a crypto wallet. Hovering above the wallet on her Witches Broomstick, she clenched her cheeks tightly around it. This "clench of doom" caused Bitcoin’s value to plummet, triggering the infamous crypto crash that led to the Crypto Winter of 2022. Her Witches Broomstick, fueled by her dark magic and destructive clench, remains a symbol of terror wherever they fly.