Thank you so much to all of you who prayed and who have checked in with me to ask how the scan went. Sad to say, it didn’t go as I hoped. They did find a small spot on my lung that they are telling me to assume is cancer because it likely is. I will confess, spent a few days during the Christmas/New Year’s break feeling pretty down and tearful and had a tough time getting out of bed. But my God is still on his throne, and everything He ordains for me is for my good. My oncologists have encouraged me not to panic, because if it is just the one, we will get it removed, and they are assuring me that all Stage Four is not the same and I can still reach long-term remission, so that’s what we’re praying for! And there is still a small chance that it is not cancer but something else, so that’s our top prayer! Living the life of a Christian doesn’t mean you don’t have hard days or that news like this won’t cause you to spend a few days curled up like Elijah. And praise him for passages where he shows his great patience with our weakness. He assures us that he is close to us when we are brokenhearted and crushed in spirit (Ps 34). But it does mean that you wrestle through it with the Lord. And you take these disappointments and fears to him, the great physician, knowing that he is ultimately the only one who can heal spiritually, emotionally, and physically. And sometimes these are the ways he grows your strength because your spiritual disciplines become much more vital when you have to fight for them through doubt and fear. The passage I’m particularly meditating on right now: “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” -2 Corinthians 4:16-18 So just wanted to give that update to those of you who asked and thank you for your prayers, I continue to covet them. (also, if you think you are not a dog person, let me just tell you, get cancer and then have this thing with a big fuzzy head in your house that somehow always seems to know right when you need him to come lay it on your chest, and that will change your feelings. 10 out of 10 highly recommend.)