There is a brutal doom loop in some people's psyche that goes like this: 1. I am terrified that I'm unlovable. ➡️ 2. If I'm rejected by the opposite sex, it will give me evidence that confirms this. ➡️ 3a. I must avoid the opposite sex. ➡️ OR 3b. I must pre-emptively reject the opposite sex to protect myself. ➡️ 4. My lack of relationships with the opposite sex is evidence that I am unlovable. ➡️ Rinse and repeat. It's an incredibly painful hell realm for the people who suffer from it. Does anyone have experience with this that would be willing to talk to me? It feels like there's something I'm missing in my model of this - maybe in the specifics of how the person wants to be loved, or recognizes it from familial dynamics, etc? One person I know who suffers from it is schizoid and uses it to protect a deep, sweet but counterproductive fantasy of how she needs the world to work to feel okay. Will this just show up differently in every personality? Or are there invariants? Happy to pay another professional for consultation if you have expertise in this. Please DM me.