I am not getting married or having kids.  I’m 34 and a former traditional woman who finally realizes how much I oppressed myself  I was told a lie by the traditional-values pipeline that “settling down early is the only path”. After years of shrinking myself and trying to be what men wanted, I felt my soul erode as relationships became something I performed instead of lived. I used to tell myself that as long as a man said he was “serious,” everything would naturally work out.. but I realize now that was a lie I accepted to avoid disappointing people. There is something deeply insidious about asking a woman to betray her ambitions and instincts just to fit into someone else’s idea of femininity. Women are not here to be protected or molded. We are meant to choose our own lives.